* * *
"Sometimes it does, yes," said Director.
"So you must choose whom you convince very carefully."
"Oh, I do choose with care. But remember, if being imposed on is what causes some of the symptoms, you have to go after the one doing the imposing, and not merely someone who'll roll over at the slightest argument."
"So you're saying you have to take a risk to snap out of depression."
"Yes, but certain kinds of risks, not just any old risk. Risks involving your tormenters."
"But if the tormenters are gone, what if I'm left with an empty, bleak feeling, the feeling of nothingness."
"If you have nothing you need something. If you feel empty you need to take something in. If things seem bleak you need to find color and warmth."
"How do I do these things?"
"To take something in, adopt a virtue. Make yourself good at something that only you know you are good at it. Make it your own, private virtue. Allow yourself to take pleasure in this."
"But what if I come to feel it's a foolish virtue, a foolish thing to do."
"This is the something you need. You need to take something in yourself seriously. Everyone tells us not to take ourselves too seriously. The problem here is when you don't take yourself seriously enough, when you don't think there is a part of you worth taking seriously, an important part, a part that doesn't get washed away in the bleakness, a part that if you love it will give you warmth and color. All of this is so regardless of how silly, or foolish, or time wasting this part of you might come to seem at times."
"You're telling me to have faith."
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Nick Pappas, pappasnick.typepad.com
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